Wednesday, August 13, 2008

You know you're a drunk when ...

You hate going to bars on Fridays and Saturdays because those are "amature" nights.

You have proof the Bud Bowl is fixed.

You start every morning by looking at last nights out-going calls and text messages

Your bar tabs impact the international price of wheat and barley.

You can’t say the word sober without making air quotes.

You once woke up with a new job.

Most days you’re up and at ‘em at five in the morning. Then you pass out.

Your favorite drinking game is "Do A Shot Every Time You Do A Shot".

You have had to hold on to grass to keep from falling off the earth

Your golf bag contains more beer than clubs.

You’ve tried to lay down on the ceiling.

You leave big tips to bartenders so they will remember you (and not shut you off)

Sometimes you think beer needs that extra kick and you add Jack.

You think Imtoodrunktostan and twelvepackistan are actual countries.

The ATF has a You division.

You know most the of people in a bar and can’t remember one of their names.

And the final way to know you are a drunk:

You play the same song 10 times in a row with the volume of a 747 at three in the morning and you think your neighbors won’t mind because, well, because it is damn good song!

- posted by Doug @ 2:56:00 PM

Comments:

Oh, it's a real nation...

This comment was posted by

The President of Twelvepackistan : 4:10 PM, August 01, 2009